reliving the past
so i was looking at my archives just curious to see what was on my mind back when i blogged more often. so i looked at the 2002 archives, since that was the year that i had the most blogs. a couple of things that i noticed about those days are that i am in the same boat back then that i am in now...loveless and jobless. i was also very vague in my descriptions of the girl drama that i was going through. referring to the offending party in the 3rd person. today, 6 years later...i find myself remembering some of that drama, but not the names. i think the main reason why i did that was either because i was worried that the girl i was describing would read this blog and know what i was thinking, or i was worried that my friends would know who she was and then question either me or her about that particular situation. haha...i did that same thing with yesterday's blog. looking back at those days, i now think...who cares? this is my blog, i can do whatever i want with it. so as a final reference to the past year and a half of my personal life that i mentioned in yesterday's blog, and for future reference when i look at this particular entry 6 years from now...ana and i broke up, she's now with my former friend chris. no more mention of that situation shall be said.

i think the thing i am most disappointed in is the fact that my demeanor hasn't changed much from those days. i'd like to say that i've grown mentally since then, but my attitude towards the personal aspects of my life still remain the same. honestly, i think what i really need to do is to stop being so passive, and be a little more aggressive towards my own personal pursuits. i'm already being aggressive with my professional life (ie, applying to grad school so i can pursue a career that i like), why not be more aggressive with searching for that special someone?

actually...i should just chill in that regard. i don't need to rush into anything right now. there really isn't anything to rush into. nobody that special exists in my life. so i should just have fun. hmm...maybe i should do this again! haha

stay tuned...we'll be back after these messages =p